The entire city of Houston gets owned

Father, it's been more than 30 years since my last confession, mainly because I'm not Catholic, but I have to confess now ... I'm a Cubs fan. So of course, I'm not too excited about the White Sox making it to the World Series, but I'll admit, it's out of jealousy. I don't want Chicago's first World Series championship in almost 90 years to be brought by the South Side, to their meth-addicted mullet-wearing Neckcar fans. My team was five outs away in 2003, but they couldn't shut the door against the Marlins. I'm not about to blame it on
some poor schmuck, because frankly, if Alex Gonzalez hadn't booted the soft grounder hit to him right after that incident,
people would remember the name 'Bartman' the same way those of us raised in the 80's originally did. In the face of adversity, the 2003 Cubs didn't have the heart of a champion. Hurts to admit it, but it's the truth. Almost as painful is that I live in Dallas, Texas, and have to hear all these fair-weather Astro fans (who were Ranger fans until September) run their holes, as if they actually care about anything other than how ugly the Cowboys have been winning right now.

Having said all that, how on earth could Brad Lidge throw that 'slider' to Albert Pujols last night? It wasn't even a slider, it was an 'er,' cuz it had no 'slide' to it at all. David Eckstein could've hit that pitch out, much less a world-class masher like Pujols, and with that whiffle-ball left-field, well .... let's just say that the ball Pujols hit still hasn't landed. If you watched the game last night, you probably noticed how amped up the crowd was at Enron Field ... until that underhand sausage was put on the plate by Houston's 'closer.' After that, it sounded like the entire city gasped. And of course, I couldn't stop laughing. Mainly because it's not my team getting owned (for a change).

Father, it's been two minutes since my last confession. I'm spiteful against the Astros because I took a weekend trip to Houston this summer to watch two Cubs/Astros games, and watched as my Cubs got pummelled both games. Yeah, yeah, I know the drill, cuz I've watched enough movies. Five Hail Marys, five Our Fathers. Got it.

P.S. Yes, I know it's technically called Minute Maid Park, but only Astros fans and sportscasters call it that. The rest of us remember. And yes, 'Pujols' is pronounced 'Poo-holes.'



huh huh huh huh huh huh