A Case for Testing Parental Ability

I fail to understand what it is about this story that people are not more up in arms about the situation. I mean, we care about gays and lesbians being together, but this douche bag is allowed to not only disappoint this woman sexually, but others as well. I fail to recognize what their argument could be. Not only would any argument they make, in all likelihood, be completely ridiculous, even by 19th century standards, but would be even more so in this day and age. I understand our right to practice whatever religion we deem fit to follow but this is pushing it to another level. Any religion that requires fortified compounds and secret rooms for forcible sex on minors is, in my opinion, missing any ground to stand on.

Having children decreases happiness

A friend of mine in Arizona sent me this article yesterday. There's some interesting stuff in it, and since I've recently made some posts about children, I had to share it with you all.

"Happiness plummets with kids' arrival

By Adam Bennett

May 08, 2008 02:42pm

MARRIAGE is a constant source of joy, but introducing children into the relationship will send your happiness in a downward spiral, a conference has been told.

Marriage, money and children were conventionally considered to be the cornerstone of happiness but such thinking did not stand up to scientific scrutiny, Harvard University psychology professor Daniel Gilbert told the Happiness and its Causes conference in Sydney today.

According to scientific and economic research, only marriage proved to be a constant source of joy.

"Figures show that married people are in almost every way happier than unmarried people - whether they are single, divorced, cohabiting," Prof Gilbert said.

"Married people live longer, married people earn more money per capita, married people have more sex and enjoy it more.

"Married people seem to be happier on every dimension that you can imagine."

Money can also buy happiness - just not as much happiness as people think.

"Money buys you a lot of happiness first and then it buys you less and less - every dollar buys you less happiness as the dollar before, and you reach a point where money is doing almost nothing for your happiness," Prof Gilbert said.

"But it's never the case that more money makes you sadder. If you get millions and millions you never get depressed about it."

And despite the belief that children were the apples of our eyes, they actually had a negative impact on happiness.

The more kids you had, the sadder you were likely to be, Prof Gilbert said.

US and European studies had shown that people's happiness did spike while they were expecting a baby but sharply plummeted after the child was born.

The low point came when children reached the ages of 12-16, and recovered only when they had flown the coop, he said.

"In reality ... children do seem to increase happiness as long as you're expecting them, but as soon as you have them, trouble sets in," he said.

"People are extremely happy before they have children and then their happiness goes down, and it takes another big hit when kids reach adolescence.

"When does it come back to it's original baseline? Oh, about the time the children grow up and go away."

Explaining why the statistics conflicted with most people's view of parenthood, Prof Gilbert made the unusual comparison to buying a pair of Armani socks.

"When people own Armani socks they can't stop telling you they are the best socks, the most amazing socks," he said.

"(But) I suspect that one of the reasons that people who own Armani socks think they are wonderful is because they have paid $85 for a pair.

"The psychologists tell us that we like things more when we pay for them - what does that sound like? It sounds like children. We pay for them in time, attention, blood, sweat and tears - what kind of idiots would we be to devote all of that to the rearing of our young if they'd didn't bring us some happiness?"

The fact that parenthood crowded out all other things in life could explain why we considered children our greatest source of joy, he said.

"Parents tell me all the time that: `My child is my greatest source of joy'," he said.

"My reply is that: `Yes, when you have one source of joy, it's bound to be your greatest'."

Why Mexicans are Godless Baby Killers!

Now that I have your attention, I thought that I might introduce myself to everyone here that reads this Commi rag. I am the blogs new court appointed brown kid. In the Midgets effort to fill his affirmative action quota, I have been invited to blog. I will make every attempt to make them interesting and/or funny, unlike Lord Bling who takes himself way too seriously. In the interest of time, I will inform everyone right off the bat that I am here to take over America and make it Mexico part deux! Happy blogging everyone! HCP

McCain's Friends and Supporters

The John McCain of Y2K must have somehow been bodysnatched, or he's finally figured out that you can't win the Republican nomination without crawling into bed with some seriously deranged folks. First, Jerry Falwell. Then, super-crazy Pastor John Hagee. Hagee is that particular brand of scary that would only be fucking nuts, if not for his ability to influence other people. In this case, a candidate for US President.

Hagee has attacked Catholics. This website has done that as well, although mostly because of the fact that several contributors to this website are still recovering from their Catholic upbringing, and not because we believe, as Hagee does, that Catholics are going to hell. Although you have to admit that it would be just a little funny if that happened.

One of the things that McCain admires most about Hagee, however, is Hagee's support of Israel. What McCain either doesn't realize or is too busy counting Evangelical votes to care is that Hagee only supports Israel because he believes that Israel is where the end of times is supposed to occur, not because he likes and respects Jews. If given the opportunity, it's likely that Hagee would convert 'em all.

When asked to renounce Hagee's endorsement, McCain declined, which is evidence that McCain has, in fact, sold his soul to the devil.

McCain Reality Check

In the New York Times today, we got the equivalent of a Cloverfield teaser trailer from Republican Presidential Candidate John McCain. He's painting a pretty picture, but Bob Ross is dead, and I'm not buying it.

First, McCain claims that if we want to get the troops home from Iraq, all we have to do is elect him President. What he fails to mention is that the reason the troops won't be in Iraq is because they will be in neighboring Iran.

Apparently, McCain also wants to lower corporate taxes. I've always thought McCain was smart enough not to buy into the same economic falacy that has been screwing our economy and increasing the national debt since the Reagan years. Is it any coincidence that the only President in the last 30 years who contained the federal budget deficit and experienced economic growth was also the only one who didn't buy into the idea that corporations share their wealth? Aside from the fact that supply-side or trickle-down economics has been emperically denied, McCain is still sticking to it. If you need evidence that his economic stimulus plan to decrease taxes on the wealthy will improve our economic situation, look at the last 8 years under Bush.

The more we learn about McCain, the scarier the situation gets.

If The Midget had a kid....

.... I have a feeling it would end up like this.

Honestly? I'm surprised something like this hasn't happened sooner.

What if Nintendo had made Halo 3?

Epic lulz.

Dead Animals = PETA photo op

Anytime the death of an animal is on the front page of your local newspaper, you know PETA will enter the media fray simply for their own promotion. Eight Belles, a girl horse that got 2nd place at the Kentucky Derby this weekend, collapsed shortly after crossing the finish line with two broken ankles. Veterenarians sent her off to eat carrots and apples in the big pasture in the sky, as her injuries were severe.

What does the world's largest organization for hypocrites have to say? Ban horse racing? Not quite. How about run the races on softer surfaces. If you're against the exploitation of animals, anything short of a ban on horse racing seems like animal exploitation to me. Then again, I have too many surviving brain cells in my frontal lobe to buy into PETAs dog and pony show. This is the same as opponents of the death penalty saying "We don't care if you execute people, our real objection is to how you do it. Use something soft, like a pillow, and I'll be happy."

Does PETA actually believe this? Of course not. PETA is a finely oiled media machine, and their pollsters told them what the repsonse would be that would give them the best media exposure. PETA isn't about a consistent message. PETA is about maximizing their visibility, even if it means abadoning their core message.

Movie Review -- Iron Man

IRON MAN -- 8 out of 10

Thanks to connections from my past life, I got to go to a press screening of the movie Iron Man last night. I'd been looking forward to seeing it since the trailer that Paramount showed during the Super Bowl, and fortunately, it didn't disappoint.

Let's start with the lead character. I'd heard mostly positive comments about the casting of Robert Downey Jr. as Tony Stark, but I'd also heard a couple of my comic-book savy friends say that he isn't suave enough. Well, I'm pleased to report that he was absolutely perfect. I think the trailers showed the jokier stuff, but he had plenty of times where he was able to be suave, and the jokier moments never felt hokey. He also had plenty of chances to be a cocky bastard, but fortunately, it's never done in a way that makes you not want to root for him. Downey Jr. also put on some muscle for the role, and while there was no hand-to-hand combat in the movie, he looks like he came prepared. He has a lot of great lines, and I think most men in their 20s and 30s will leave the theater secretly wishing they were Tony Stark ... and that's not a bad thing!

But that's just one of the characters. Fortunately, most of the other actors had enough to do to where no one felt wasted. Terrence Howard is great as Rhodes, and there's even a quick 'War Machine' reference that will get a slight laugh from most of the audience, but will have fans of the comic book drooling over the possibilities of a sequel. Gwyneth Paltrow was solid as well, and had enough to do to where she wasn't just window dressing. There are even some smaller parts that left a lasting impression, including a government agent who keeps trying to schedule a meeting with Tony, but can't seem to get on his calendar. His last line in the film will also have the fanboys salivating. My only complaint performance-wise would be Jeff Bridges, as he felt a little hammy in a couple of scenes, but it's not so bad that it ruined anything. Although I couldn't help but see him drink scotch and imagine that it was a White Russian...

Okay, I know what you're thinking. 'Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. How well did stuff blow up?' I'd have to say that stuff blowed up pretty good. The effects were great, but never felt show-offy. That's the best compliment I can give them. The director (Jon Favreau) didn't let the CGI get in the way of the story, and the film is all the better for it. My one concern is that there isn't as much action as some people may be hoping for, and I hope that doesn't hurt it at the box office. However, I think the first X-Men and Spider-Man films had a similar problem, and it didn't hurt them. Also, the action that is there is a lot better than most summer blockbusters because it's on a smaller scale, and there is an amount of pathos that I think most people will appreciate. In fact, this might be the only time I've reviewed a summer blockbuster where I used the word 'pathos,' so take that as you will. Let's just say it's not something most people will notice, but it's there. There's enough going on in the story to where you don't have to check your brain entirely if you don't want to. Again, that's probably the best compliment I can give to a big-budget action movie.

I have to admit that the final 30 minutes are just a tiny-bit disappointing. Favreau loses some steam in the pacing in the final act, but I think this is more of a reflection of how great the first 90 minutes are. It needs to come to a conclusion, and you feel it pushing to get there, even if you don't want it to. The final battle that occurs isn't as SLAM-BANG as some people may be wanting, but I like how it was handled. I won't go to any spoilers, but I'll just say that I didn't feel like the conditions of the battle were forced, because it was all set up properly, so I accepted it with no hesitations.

Overall, it was a very solid film, and a great launch to what will hopefully be a successful franchise. I don't think it will be as big at the box office as Transformers, because it has less action and doesn't have as much franchise awareness, but the action in it is well-done, and the entire film has a lot of heart, which I wasn't expecting. In terms of the quality of recent comic-book origin films, I'd put it slightly behind X-Men, but ahead of Transformers and Spider-Man. I think it will finish around $200 million in the States, which would make it a success. Maybe then we could count on a sequel, which I would welcome with open arms. Bring on the War Machine!

More Grand Theft Auto goodness

Here's the official TV commercial for GTA IV, just released:



I was up until almost 3:00 a.m. last night with some friends, for no reason other than to cause havoc and destruction. One guy in the game stole a city bus, and then a few of us jumped on with him, broke out some windows, and did driveby shootings at homeless people and cops. I argued with an Australian friend of mine over who called shotgun, and then we shot at each other with shotguns. I tried to run over an old lady while I was driving a sports sedan, and I was so upset that I missed, I got out of the car, knifed her in the face and then teabagged her, all while my passengers were observing and chuckling. We went to an Irish pub and then someone shot an RPG at the liquor bottles behind the bar, and the building caught fire. We then ran outside and found a swarm of cops all shooting at us. Then we high-tailed it to the airport, stole helicopters, and flew around the Statue of Liberty, all the while shooting mounted .50cals at each other. Then I flew mine downtown near the MetLife building, tried to land on top of it, but I broke the propeller blades off, so I then jumped 59 stories to my death.

How many other games let you do these kinds of insane things?