Pirates don't do it for me. I'm a ninja guy. Just ask my girlfriend. When we watched The Last Samurai in a theater, ninjas showed up about half-way through it, and I was surprised and ecstatic to the point of my yelling out, 'NINJAS!' She quickly shushed me, but it didn't damper my enthusiasm. I LOVE NINJAS. Not as much as this guy, but he's the ultimate fanboy.
I never understood the appeal that pirates have with some people. They wear frilly shirts and like to sword fight. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but still. To me, it's no competition. Ninjas are stealthy, they use stuff like smoke bombs and ninja stars, and they kill people. That's their job. Killing. How can there even be a question of who's cooler? Now, maybe if more pirates looked like this:
... instead of like this:
Having said all of that, I know Ryan pretty well. He is a full-fledged pirate, and he needs to have his day in the sun. So, today is his day:
Now if you'll excuse me, I have ta be gettin' back to swabbin' the deck.