Monday, December 10, 2007

The Cheats Lose (Again)

I'll be the first to admit it's been a rough year for my Denver Broncos. Our defense has played as though we've been starting deceased CB Darrent Williams despite his death. Jay Cutler's been more inconsistent than sex for married people. The Broncos will likely miss the playoffs barring a significant collapse by one of the team's ahead of them in the next four weeks. But on this Monday morning, I'm smiling. Why? Because no matter how bad this season was, the Broncos still managed to beat the KC Chiefs both times they played them, and considering how the game went yesterday beat is an understatement. ESPN chose the word crush to describe what the Broncos did to the Chiefs.

Watch for the following excuses from Cheats fans that you might encounter:

Inexperienced QB - Didn't seem to keep the Broncos from throwing 6 TD passes in the two meetings this year. I thought I was going to miss Trent Green, but I don't.

The Chiefs have been decimated by injuries - Two Broncos were killed in the off-season.

Herm Edwards is a shitty coach - I'll give you that one. I've been saying that since he was with the Jets.

Because both the Broncos and the Chiefs are all but mathmatically eliminated from the playoffs, the Chiefs will have to wait until next year to experience this level of humiliation at the hands of the Mile High marauders again. And I can't wait.


Lord Bling said...

It's funny how you're revelling in how our Broncos are 'less shitty' than the Chiefs.

And I'm revelling in it too! Suck it, KC!

miles said...

I'm not suprised or pissed at the result of this game. This ass kicking was a long time coming and well deserved. I fully expect the Chump's next home game against Tennessee to be blacked out, and I'm not upset about it. Basically our GM has sold KC fans a giant shit sandwich and we gobbled it up. Hopefully he will either abondon his job or the hope that we must 'win now'.
The Chiefs need help BADLY in two positions, well three:

Offensive Line- Dear god, 5 Terry Shaivos could block better than our O Line has this year. A few words for John Welbourn: GET. BACK. ON. THE. JUICE.

Secondary. Law and Surtain were formidible back in 2000, but in 2007 they are about 3 steps slow. When fucking Brandon Stokley is burning you for TD's, its time to hang them up. And why the fuck is there no safety help? This the goddamned COVER 2!

Offensive Coordinator. When the viewers at home know what the play is going to be before the play runs, its time to start putting out resume's other places. Oh, and running a draw on 3rd and 18 is not a sign of genius by catching the other team off guard. Its a sign that you've given up because the other team knows its coming too. Fuck you, Mike Solari, and fuck you Dick Curl (actual name).

Brodie Croyle is inexperienced, but Peyton Manning wouldn't have success if he is looking up after the sky because the other team's DEs are plowing him driving I-77, I-60, I-71 and I-74.

Yeah there have been a few injuries but that is why you have competant back-ups. And you have so many injuries because other people suck and aren't doing their jobs.

I am glad that you guys did enjoy your Super Bowl this year.


Lord Bling said...

Wow. Dude, you should post that on the Chiefs official website or something.

How are you enjoying the ice storm? Do you get to 'work' from home today? Since today is my last day, I should be home a little early, so I'll jump into some Call of Duty 4 with you...

CowboyLaw said...

Sorry I can't help you. The Chiefs are bad this year. It's no accomplishment to beat them. However, I will say this, vis a vie the Donkeys: the Chiefs are by and large a young team getting substantial contributions from young players. The entire Donkeys defense had a chance to vote for Reagan for president. The Chiefs need to fix the O line, fire Mike Solari, and get LJ healthy again, and once that's done, we're right back in the game. The Donkeys are heading into the sunset, and I see nothing on that team that tells me they'll be any better in the next 3 years.

Ryan the Angry Midget said...

Yeah, you're right about the Broncos, except really you're not. We have a starting rookie running back (Selvin Young), a second-year QB who actually is getting better (unlike Brodie Croyle), and a crop of young wide receivers. You have Dwayne Bowe, but the offense is so boring and the QB so terrible that you'll never get him the ball. Herm will just ride Larry Johnson to death or until he loses his job. The glory days for your cheats was when you were losing to the Broncos when we were winning super bowls. It ain't getting better than that for you.

Cowboylaw said...

Right. Except Selvin Young suxor, Cutler is horrible, and (except for one) the receivers aren't really that promising. And nothing on the D side of the team whatsoever.

Sorry, ain't buying it.