Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Evanescence Sucks Worse than Texas

Where her nose once was, a pop sensation exists instead.
Fall is always the best time of year for music lovers, like myself. Deftones have a new album coming out on Halloween that is being praised as being more like Adrenaline and Around the Fur, two of the greatest albums of all time. The Killers, My Chemical Romance, and Beck all have new albums coming out in the next few weeks. Unfortunately, Evanescence also has a new album The Open Door.
When I first heard Evanescence on the radio several years ago, I wondered how anyone could listen to a lead screamer who sounded like a 14 year-old on the rag with lyrics that make Creed seem multi-dimensional. I thought "Certainly, no one will buy this crap." And when people don't buy crap, record companies find different crap to pawn off on us as music, I write on my blog, and the cycle continues. It seemed perfect.
Except for one detail. Evanescence went like do-deca-hepta-platinum, and today, their follow-up album is released. Anyone unfortunate enough to have radio reception where they live has heard the new single about how the lead singer's boyfriend is a drunk who only calls when he wants to tap that freaky white ass. For a minute, I thought one of my ex-girlfriends had started a crappy band, but even my ex-girlfriends, who are categorically crazy skanks, would not listen to this band.
Evanescence is a perfect example of why popular music sucks. Bands like One Side Zero are completely original and amazing and write songs that are dinstguishable not only from songs on their current album, but also are distinguishable from the songs they have released on other albums. Yet, has anyone aside from Lord Bling and the Shelfo twins heard of One Side Zero? Bands like The Fray, Evanescence and Creed should give this a shot. They might not make as much money, but there would be that much less ear pollution to go on the Gray's Anatomy Soundtrack Volume 47.
Currently, Evanescence The Open Door is the number one selling album on Amazon.com. And Americans try to argue that we don't have shitty taste in music? Right.

11 comments:

CowboyLaw said...

See, this is why I only buy dance mixes. No one is being hurt when I buy a remix of "Waiting for a star to fall" that lasts 20 minutes and only contains 3 lines of lyrics, each repeated about 400 times.

One nice thing about commuting by cable car: no radio, just Ipod.

One nice thing about driving a Passat: XM radio.

I can't even remember the last time I listened to FM. Didn't they have that in, like, the Depression?

Lord Bling said...

I take the train to work, and slap my MP3 player on my ears. With noise cancelling headphones too, cuz I hate people. :)

Onesidezero are great. However, I'll take the bait and say that I like The Fray. They're a lot more Brit-pop than anything else. They just played that first single into the ground, that's all. It's a pretty good album otherwise.

Oh, and:

10/24 -- new Converge
10/31 -- new Isis

Ryan the Angry Midget said...

Lord Bling's been watching too much Gay's Anatomy. I respect your taste in music, but the Fray? Seriously. Why not just go back and pull out some old Oasis or the Verve or Coldplay. Those bands are all brit-pop, they're actually good, and the entire albums are not predicated on one piece of crap song either.

NIN said...

I've actually heard of Onesidezero. Even bought "Is this Room Getting Smaller." Granted, Lord Bling introduced me to them, but that's beside the point. Them and Devin Townsend have been added to my music collection thanks to Bling. The rest of my music consists of everyone's favorite, soon to be on the next soundtrack for Grey's Anatomy, type of stuff. Well, that and butt rock from the 80's and early 90's.

Lord Bling said...

'Gay's Anatomy?' You're a witty one. Truthfully, I've never seen that show, but I've seen the shitty commercials where they play Fray songs. If you gave the album a listen, you'd see that there are other good songs on it. Only problem is that they seem to be in a hurry to sell whatever song ABC is willing to buy to slap on some prime-time soap opera commercial. Speaking of selling out, how many times do I have to hear 'All around the world' from Oasis in those fucking AT&T commercials???

Again, I say:

New Converge CD -- 10/24
New Isis CD -- 10/31

Ryan the Angry Midget said...

Noel and Liam have to pay for their coke habit, and AT&T is the only company with enough bank to support it. Those commercials should have pictures of the Gallaghers doing lines all around the globe.

Miles said...

What? I LOVE Evanescence!

Signed,
NIN.

Anonymous said...

Did you seriously just name My Chemical Romance as a good band?......

Ya....maybe 6 years ago....

How can I take your opinion seriously now?....

Oh...it's ok...you wrote this in 06' before the suckfest that they call The Black Parade was released...

You are forgiven...

sanda427 said...

You probably have ZERO talent. Her voice is the only one That's ever made me fullout cry. You need to stop listening to your Rap and Hip hop and get hearing aids.

Anonymous said...

EVANESCENCE RULES!!!!!!!!

you are fudge packing faggot!

Anonymous said...

Most people who hate Evanscene also hate hip hop and rap (there the same thing really). Evanscence is pseudo (that means wanna be) goth rock. Yeah pretty vocals are so important not actual lyrical skills it's all about vocals your a genius and have opened my eyes its not originality its not lyrics it's a pretty voice. I'm betting Sonic Youth hurts your ears (I'm a fan and it hurts mine) Ever heard of Alanis Morisete? She's the 90,s Amy Lee writing cheap songs about how guys suck and use cheap vocals to sing those cheap lyrics. Listen to The Cure if you want break up songs there actually constructive.