If you hit a midget on the head with a stick, he turns into 40 glittering gold coins.
If you throw a midget into a tub of hot water, he makes sleepy-time tea.
If you kick a midget in the balls, he turns into 8 squirrels and they run off into the woods.
If you lose a fight with a midget, you become a midget. So, be the bigger man. Literally.
With all apologies to Patton Oswalt.
Who says I can't be brief?