Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Halloween in the Workplace

Happy Halloween.

When you're a kid and even when you're in college, dressing up for Halloween was an event that you looked forward to. For some reason, when you get out into the working world, something goes horribly wrong and adults violate the cardinal rule of Halloween: wearing a lame costume as an excuse to violate your place of employment's dress code.

We've all seen it. Carl over in Accounting is dressed up in jeans and his Nebraska Cornhusker's t-shirt because he's going to be a Husker fan for Halloween. If I were Carl's boss, I would fire him and then hire a bunch of kids dressed up like pirates to rape and murder him for abusing the opportunity to dress up, simply because he's too lazy to throw on his usual polo shirt and khakis.

Halloween is not an excuse for adults to wear whatever the hell they want to work. You either go big, or call in sick if you want to wear jeans and your REO Speedwagon t-shirt.

One rather large lady that I work with today wore her regular work attire with little fairy wings. I wanted to be like "Hey lady, unless you strap some jet engines to those fairy wings, you ain't flying anywhere." Instead, I said "What are you supposed to be?" And she admitted to me that she just wanted to take the opporunity to wear wings to work. THE AUDACITY!!!

While I round up my band of midget pirates to smite her, you'd better go out and get a real costume or prepare to feel the wrath.

3 comments:

Lord Bling said...

I'm an AK-47 away from being a disgruntled office worker today. Does that count?

Anonymous said...

Reasons that my work will always be teaching small children, cause damn it they do Halloween - and every other holiday for that matter - right :)

Anonymous said...

A bunch of the kids I work with dressed in Drag. Should i be worried when this is day one of my new job?