Sunday, March 30, 2008
What's going on in there?
I know it's been a long time since I've posted. Between school and work and travel for work and school, I have no free time. I am writing this while sitting in the DC airport (still can't call it Reagan, sorry). You're wondering about the picture, right?
It dawned on me the other day while I was dropping the kids off at the pool in a public restroom how hilarious it is that we attempt to downplay our activities when we use a public restroom. As if other guys have no idea what we're doing in there. Guys, in particular, only hit the stall in a public restroom for one reason: you have a big brown dog barking at your back door, and you need to let him out. Why is it then that it sounds like people are trying to take the quietest shit ever? It's not a library. It's the one place in public that you can shit and not spend a night in jail (aside from the I-80 overpass at 72nd street in Omaha and LordBling's front porch).
My new policy is to let the shit explosion commence. No more coy public restroom behavior. I pity the guys in adjacent bathrooms stalls. They're going to think I'm kick-starting a Harley. The walls will shake. I'm done pulling my cheeks apart (a.k.a the silencer) to lessen the acoustic ramifications of my pooping. Join the revolution!