I know it's been a long time since I've posted. Between school and work and travel for work and school, I have no free time. I am writing this while sitting in the DC airport (still can't call it Reagan, sorry). You're wondering about the picture, right?
It dawned on me the other day while I was dropping the kids off at the pool in a public restroom how hilarious it is that we attempt to downplay our activities when we use a public restroom. As if other guys have no idea what we're doing in there. Guys, in particular, only hit the stall in a public restroom for one reason: you have a big brown dog barking at your back door, and you need to let him out. Why is it then that it sounds like people are trying to take the quietest shit ever? It's not a library. It's the one place in public that you can shit and not spend a night in jail (aside from the I-80 overpass at 72nd street in Omaha and LordBling's front porch).
My new policy is to let the shit explosion commence. No more coy public restroom behavior. I pity the guys in adjacent bathrooms stalls. They're going to think I'm kick-starting a Harley. The walls will shake. I'm done pulling my cheeks apart (a.k.a the silencer) to lessen the acoustic ramifications of my pooping. Join the revolution!
8 comments:
Obviously, you've not been in a public restroom when I'm performing. This has been my policy since college. Let it fly!
We have guys at work that sound like dueling assholes when they get in the stalls.
That post and these comments made my day and probably my tomorrow as well.
Hey campblood, were they playing Battleshits?
They are constantly playing Battleshits at work. Usually a guy in each stall & at least one guy at the urinal chiming in by farting while pissing.
The women in our office must either play Battleshits or who can flush the bigger tampon?
I swear we have a revolving account with Roto Rooter, they are here every week cleaning out the ladies.
Lulz!
Women involved in bathroom hijinx!? That reminds me of the "Mad Shitter" that used to strike in the womans bathroom at my old job. Lord Bling, remind me to tell you about that one someday. ;)
w_m,
I think you need to tell all of us about the "Mad Shitter."
Here a link to pooping at work etiquette & terminology from the Pooping Friends Network:
http://www.sendthisnow.com/2005/02/work-poop-survival-guide.html
Post a Comment