Sunday, December 17, 2006

Poor Omahans (Omahaites? Omahonians? Who Cares?)

First, let me say that I am also not a fan of Blogspot selling its soul, even to benevolent giant Google. What a pain in the ass! Also, I am not a fan that they didn't tell any of us, the authors of the content that draws people to their site and generates the ad revenue they depend on. If I wanted a Google account, I'd have signed up for it by now. I can't see any reason for Blogspot to require me to do so. Except that Google needs more members so they can increase the amount of money they charge for "premium links."

Okay, with that out of the way, on with the show.

CNN recently featured an article about a family in Omaha (this blog's home office locale). The point of the article is that this poor family, with a household income of merely $150,000, is finding it hard to pay their bills. Allow me to make the following observations.

1. Have these people so lost touch with the common man that they believe this article will generate anything other than hatred and contempt?? The family's complaints seem so genuine that they really appear to expect an avalanche of consolative emails. As it is, I just want to have them all killed.

2. The unintentional point of the article appears to be that, if one income earner loses his job, he should not embark on a money-spending spree vaguely disguised as a half-assed investment stategy.

3. This family has 4 kids, ages 9 to 4. At a minimum, this suggests that Mom and Dad's favorite hobby is essentially free. Let me ask this question: WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THAT? Most of the intelligent people I know have had one kid, and said "Wow, this is so much harder than we anticipated. Let's wait at least a few years before having another, if we have another at all." The Schuetts appear to have been under the impression that having babies would soon be illegal, thus they should squeeze out as many as possible in the years they had left. If they're really that hard up, they should sell the youngest daughter. 4-year-old white girls fetch a pretty price on the black market, and it's hard to believe either parent could be all that attached to her. After all, in the scramble to spend time with 4 kids under the age of 10, how many minutes of quality alone-time do you think they've had with her? I'm betting less than 100 hours.

Bottom line: this family falls into the group of people whom I believe it should be legal to hunt for sport. Other members include people who own more than 2 pieces of Abercrombie clothing, men not involved in competitive swimming who own Speedo banana hamocks, and poor people who vote Republican. Darwin's theory needs to be respected, and these people need to be eliminated from the gene pool, lest their genes be passed on. (GPA points out that the parents' genes have already been passed on. But people who carefully read my post will notice that I said the ENTIRE family should be eligible to be hunted, thus solving this problem.)

4 comments:

Lord Bling said...

Amen.

Ryan the Angry Midget said...

A couple of local observations:

1) I find it VERY interesting that the article describes Elkhorn as having a "livable" standard of living. Homes in Elkhorn on average are significantly more expensive than homes in Omaha.

2) In the picture of the family, the source of much of the family's financial turmoil is revealed: the own at least one horse. CowboyLaw knows this from experience, as his name would imply, but owning horses is not an inexpensive venture. I've heard it proposed that you could feed horses cash, and actually save money.

3) Why doesn't Dad get a fucking job? Aside from putting all of his eggs in the pharmaceutical sales basket, (which is essentially a job for extroverted people with no intelligence) something tells me there's more to the Daddy ain'ts gots a job story than what CNN is telling us.

4) People with as much income as these two pukes had when they both had jobs without savings are financial nitwits. Quitting contributing to her 401k when her husband lost his job may have actually made things worse as their tax liability may have been significantly greater.

5) Stop making kids. There is no reason, outside of lazyness and contempt for the planet, that people should have 4 kids.

Anonymous said...

So, let me get this right. The husband WAS a sales rep, which means he couldn't even hack it at that shit, and they went and overextended themselves on bills? What the fuck do those kids eat, $100 bills? They have no appreciable debt to speak of, at least according to the article, so what they hell are they spending their money on?
And unless that horse is moonlighting in German porn videos, how is the horse less expensive than ballet lessons for the girls? Hell, even then, the horse is pulling down more cash than the dad. They didn't even buy the horse themselves for Christ sake.
Oh well, my heart bleeds for them.

-HCP

Anonymous said...

I think the initial blog retort and some of the comments may be a little harsh. I agree the family sounds like idiots, but my family of 3 (wife and 1 kid with child support going to an x on the 2nd) just stepped into the 31% tax brackets on income >~$80k. This happened because my wife went back to work so we could do a little better than rommin every night for dinner. We've been to several accountants who have no clue about maximizing IRS deductions and I wonder if they've even been to the IRS website. Anyway, now we split a package of rommin for dinner because our tax burden went from getting refunds of about $500/year to IRS debt of about $16k which was is above and beyond what is already taken out of our checks and is JUST < 1/2 of my wifes yearly salary, which a significant amount of that goes to daycare even though or child is in school "full time" (1st grade).

sorry about the run-on sentence - I get a little wordy when I'm passionate

We've taken steps (hsa, maximized 401k and saved every receipt) for this year but I'll be suprised if we made a dent in the burden.

I want to know how the giants are doing it because at the bottom of the top tax bracket - it really really sucks.

Maybe I should quit and try to get some CNN sympathy?

k2 (JW'S FRIEND) - and dont bother with the beating about how old this thread is.